Minnesota Marauders Press Releases

  • Welcome to Minnesota. BOOM +

    "Let's get this thing rolling" were Layne Hensley's final words to his squad before the game against Las Vegas in his strong southern accent. It's a common statement that the difference between good players and great players is that great players make others around them play even better then they otherwise would. Great players elevate those around them to whole new level. "Blake Cobb is great player" Says Hensley at the game. "His addition to our squad basicly means we're gonna out-rebound you. If you're coming to Minnesota then you better come to crash the boards or we'll walk all over you. Offensively the trio of Michael, Blake and Andrew is gonna score on you. There is now so much Read More
  • Treachery, Treason and Trophies! +

    It's been a tough and unforgiving off-season for the Marauders. Loyalty is a belief system told in fairytales to children, and the desire to actually win the Heikkinen Cup is more a metaphor for getting paid big bucks, not actually winning the cup itself. The proof of this is in the pudding. Fathers in Minnesota told their sons without a trace of doubt in their minds that their boys heroes will return to their beloved team to do nothing more than perform better than they did the year before. "We wont just play playoffs kids, we'll play finals". Lets make 1 thing clear. Loyalty and the desire to win are dead! Money rules the world and money rules the OBWL. Read More
  • Minnesota Release Financials +

    The Minnesota finance office have released the numbers for 2019 and stake holders are grinning from ear to ear as Minnesota records record profits. Gibson pointed out the continued growth in crowd numbers as interest in the Marauders thrives and their push into the second round of the playoffs as major factors contributing to the bloated $55 million profit. CROWD NUMBERS AND TICKET REVENUE Regular season. Despite the rise in ticket revenue for 2019 the regular season actually saw a dip in ticket sales revenue despite attendance being higher. A $900,000 loss on the previous year was recorded due to the drop in sale price of club seats and luxury suites in an attempt to lure more spectators to games. Read More
  • Marauders Defeated in the Desert +

    The season of Minnesota may have ended in a tight struggle at the hands of the Arizona T-Birds but GM Gibson stands by his troops with head held high singing high praise of his valiant players. For the first time in Marauder history they break out of the first round of the playoffs by defeating the highly fancied Toronto Huskies to break a long standing hoodoo hanging over the organisation and then went toe to toe with the division champions narrowly being beating down the stretch by the T-Birds in the second round. It was a season of 2 halves for the Marauders. The first half they played soft, sloppy ball. The second they emerged as a giant striking fear Read More
  • The Horde march on Quebec +

    Funs over, all-star game has come and gone, blades are out, streets are empty and quite, it's dark and cold, Quebec Canada. A bus can be heard growling down the empty streets of Quebec, lock your doors and keep your children indoors is the advice given by Minnesota officials, we bring the horde! The bus continues to growl up the cold streets, a wild chant can be heard from inside as the horde roles up. "It's show time" Ronald Long shouts from the top stair of the bus. "We here Gerry, we here for ya. Comin to get ya boy" "2 games in Quebec and no meet and greet Gerry? And i thought we we're friends" smiled Andrew Bordo "I Read More
  • Lights Out Bordo +

    It's been a great fortnight of Basketball for Minnesota playing solid basketball on the their home court which has been capped off by Andrew Bordo being named player of the week for the 8th time in his career. It has been raining 3's all week long in Minnesota largely led by Bordo who has been lights out in the 3 games played during his week of excellence shooting an amazing 21-32 (.656) from down town. The limited chances Bordo got at the charity strike he drained going 100% and walking away from the week with an overall FG% of .573 on 39-68 shooting and a scoring average of 35 points per game. In accepting the award a humble Bordo said Read More
  • Booker wants Lucier back, Gibson says no +

    By Thomas Vanviking Chief Sports Writer, Minneapolis Mail Gibson has slammed the door shut on Isaiah Booker's plead to have Elroy Lucier return to the starting 5 as soon as he has recovered from his dislocated shoulder. According to health experts Elroy Lucier should be available for selection any day and could make his return against division rivals and leaders the Arizona Thunderbirds but has not been named to take part in the game. Lucier has very publicly fallen out of favor with Gibson after Lucier's poor performance during training camp. Things got even worse between the pair as the season progressed, Gibson fuming over Elroy's poor protection of the basketball leading the league in turnovers and lack of defensive Read More
  • Payday Inc. New Player Agent in Town +

    A new sports player agency has opened it's door in downtown Minneapolis. Bill Dolari has teamed up with local 36 year old entrepreneur Ben Jakovich to form Payday Inc. The unlikely pair will play completely different roles in the company. Bill Dolari who has quickly created a reputation of being outspoken and even disrespectful at times somehow managed to convinced a well mannered, sharply dressed and well built businessman in Jakovich to finance the company outright. Bill Dolari can also add stubborn to his list of shortcomings as the name Payday Inc was contested by Jakovich who later gave in when Dolari started to behave dangerously smashing a glass vase and throwing glass shards around the room before urinating in Read More
  • HoRod Linked to the Marauders +

    Minnesota fans are excited about the prospect of Horace Rodriquez joining the Minnesota Marauders. Online forums have been a buzz with the rumor of HoRod coming to town but neither the Tritons or Marauders have confirmed nor denied the rumor which has only added fuel to the hype surrounding the rumor. Speculation has been ripe as to who the Marauders are shipping out, according to some fans Alejandro Craft has purchased a house in Tampa and enrolled his children at a private school there. Fans seem happy with the deal who seem desperate to get wins. Others say Ervin Holmes has walked out on the club on the advice of his outspoken agent Bill Dolari in order to get that Read More
  • Swervin Ervin and Gibson in Contract Stalemate +

    -THOMAS VANVIKING Big man Ervin "Swervin" Holmes has signaled his intention to stay a Marauder under the leadership of Gibson and the coaching staff stating that he loves the city and the ball club but according to Holmes' agent Bill Dolari a deal has not been agreed upon and Holmes has been urged by Dolari to weigh up his options in free agency or demand a trade and sign on with his new team. Bill Dolari unleashed a verbal barrage against Gibson and labelled him as "a stubborn old mule" and says Gibson "wouldn't know good talent from a bar stool". According to Dolari an offer for Holmes is on the table but it's not an offer Dolari or Holmes Read More
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